Friday, July 27, 2007

One day at a time

I survived day two. The headache never did go away and actually has continued into today, though it is a bit less painful. i finally broke down and took excedrine. I didn't want to take it because it has caffeine and I've been working really really hard to eliminate caffeine from my diet completely, but sometimes it's the only thing that will get rid of the headaches. I worry a little bit about how often I have headaches. Is it normal to get them weekly? I've noticed that I get them for several days in a row before & sometimes after my period, which makes me think it's hormonal. I also get them often when I'm dieting. Eh, maybe someday I'll mention it to a doctor. The thing is I don't want to end up on a bunch of medications. Particularly not now. I want to see if losing weight doesn't take care of the headaches first.

So, as I was saying I survived yesterday and only had 1200 calories. Today I will probably aim for 1400. I don't want to stick to the same calorie count each day since I've noticed my body seems to lose better if I keep a bit of variety to the amount I consume: 1000 one day, 1500 the next, 1200 the day after that and so on.

I've been giving this alot of thought and decided that this time around I can't give myself days off. I made that mistake last time I tried to diet. I'd be very strict for a week and then allow myself to eat whatever I wanted on the weekends. Then the weekends would turn into three or four or five days off the diet, then going completely off it for an entire month. I don't think it works for me to have 'days off'. I need to stick to calorie counting every single day. Sure if I'm dying for chocolate or a piece of pizza, I think I should allow myself to have some;so long as I still make sure I don't go over 1600 calories a day.  So basically that is the diet I'm following. Eat what I feel like eating (within reason) so long as I stay under 1600 calories EACH AND EVERY DAY. I need to be consistent and focused.

I also know that for me, eating out is a huge downfall. It's too easy to underestimate how many calories I'm consuming. We do a great deal of running around on weekends and it isn't likely that we can come home to eat our meals so I have to figure out a way to eat healthily when I'm away from home. I've discussed it with my husband and told him I'm going to start carrying meal replacement bars with me. If we end up at a restaurant where I can't get something that will be in my calorie range then I'm eating the replacement bar with milk. He's agreed not to pressure me to eat with him. Before, it always made him feel guilty if he ate and I didn't but we've talked about it and I think he knows I need his support on this. One of the biggest mistakes I've made has been to try and match him at meal times. He can consume 3x's the amount of food I can and yet not gain weight. I'd try to eat the same things and I've gained 80 lbs. It's got to stop. I really have to start listening to what makes my body feel good and overeating certainly doesn't make me feel good, physically or emotionally.

I won't be posting during the weekend so you'll hear how everything went on Monday. I'm really determined to have good things to report!!!! Pray for me, lol.

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